I was sitting on my bed, fumbling through the bills, trying to figure out how I was going to pay each and every one of them and in a timely fashion. I looked up and saw my daughter staring at herself in the mirror. She was looking so intently, that I decided to ask her, “What do you see when you look in there?”
She turned and pointed to me.
I was not proud of the woman that she was pointing at. I was immediately reminded of God’s
promise that He has come to give us life and give it more abundantly. I was not living that life.
That is when I decided to make it my mission to plant seeds of encouragement: not just for my children or myself, but for young girls all over the world.
Of course, this mission had to start with me with caring for, valuing and investing in myself. The only way that I would be able to do that intentionally and successfully was truly see myself the way that God sees me, to know my value and worth through Him and Him only. Once I learned that, accepted His mercy and His grace over my life, things started to look different. I was curious and decided to take a look at the statistics of our young girls. I was astounded by what I saw.
Let me share some of this information with you:
Global research shows that 6 out of 10 girls are so concerned with the way they look that they actually opt out of participating fully in daily life (Dove Self-Esteem Project).
7 in 10 girls believe that they are not good enough or do not measure up in some way, including their looks, performance in school and relationships with family and friends (Real girls, Real Pressure: National Report of the State of Self-Esteem, Dove self Esteem Fund).
75% of girls with low self-esteem reported engaging in negative activities like cutting, bullying, smoking, drinking or disordered eating.
All of this, coupled my own experience with low self-esteem, pushed me to make sure that I played my part in ensuring our girls are not one of these statistics. If they did feel this way about themselves, I would share the practical tools needed to combat such feelings. Ultimately, my goal was to provide my daughter with the information needed to participate in and cultivate God fearing, healthy relationships. Frankly, it starts with the relationship that individuals have with God.
The funny thing is, we can share this message with our girls all day, and preach about it until we turn blue in the face, but the reality is we ourselves as mothers, mentors, sisters, grandmothers or friends in their lives, have to be practicing these skills ourselves. We all know that actions speak louder than words, and so we have to give girls practical tools so that they can intentionally focus on this.
First, I believe that there are 5 keys in order to practice having healthy confidence and knowing your worth through Christ.
Are you ready to hear them? Great! Grab a pen and paper and let’s get into it.
1. Beauty-FULL Purpose: It’s important that we have the foundation of knowing that we all have special gifts, talents and skills. God has given each and every one of us gifts. Just take a look at the word. A gift is something that is given to you, so let’s embrace it and see how we can use our gifts to serve.
For example, are you passionate about writing? Perhaps you can write short stories and share them. This may bring joy to someone who loves to read. Do you love to create art? Practice painting or drawing, because your drawings could light up someone’s day. Whatever you do, remember that you and your gifts are needed in this world.
2. Oohh La La: This is taking care of what I lovingly call your “shell”, which is your outside being. I believe that when you look good, you feel good. We do not want to be conceited or get caught up in being vain, but it is super important we practice personal hygiene, such as using lotion on our skin, moisturizing our lips, trying new hair styles, etc. There is so much to try and do, so we should not get bored.
3. Journey: Journey means to travel, to go, to move from one place to another. If you really take a look at the word, it’s an action word. It’s important that we have the desire to want to travel outside of what we think is the norm. It allows us to see new things, meet new people, try new foods.
Another part of journey is exercising our bodies. It’s important that we stay active, such as going for a walk around the block, riding our bike or roller skating. No matter what you do, try and find some time and some way to exercise your body consistently.
4. Nourish: It is important the we are mindful with the things that we put inside of our bodies.
Anything that we eat should be in moderation so that we can have a healthy relationship with
5. Investment: I love to leave this for last, because it’s definitely super important. If you are
reading this, you already know the importance of investing in yourself. It’s important that we
not only make time for ourselves, but for the people that we care about in our lives.
Finally, we want to be a good steward with our money. You can do this by saving and being mindful with what you are spending your money on and using some to give back.
Not only are these five keys important, but consistently practicing them has led to several knowing their worth through Christ, increased confidence, purpose alignment, and more. Remember, knowing your worth through Christ and intentionally seeking Him will allow you to be able to practice these things to prevent you from becoming comfortable with developing habits that lead to an unhealthy lifestyle.
God will walk you through the girl, then young lady, and ultimately the woman He is calling you to become. This will also prepare you for other relationships in your life. Throughout your journey you will grow, learn, and value yourself enough to have boundaries, capture red flags, and not make excuses for people.
Remember, all of this takes practice, times, patience, and learning. As human beings, we were never created to be perfect.
I hope and pray that you receive this information and find value in the things that were talked about.
Be safe out there, and God bless.
About the Author:
Keisha Montfleury is first a believer in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, then a mom, and next an entrepreneur. She is the founder of Abundantly Authentic which is a Nonprofit whose purpose is to encourage our young girls to know their worth through Christ. Keisha has written 3 books specifically designed for our girls to practice the skills to a HEALTHY CONFIDENCE while giving them the practical tools. She is also a proud mom of 3 beautiful kids, and currently resides in Southern California.
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