Boundaries: The Uncomfortable Yes Behind a Powerful No

Uncomfortable moments are just that—uncomfortable. 😩 If you’ve ever been in one (and who hasn’t?), you know the feeling: being expected to shrink, stay silent, or go along to get along—all in the name of keeping the peace. Let’s be honest, there’s nothing peaceful about betraying ourselves to avoid upsetting others.

Here’s the truth:

Our actions should never be driven by fear, and our dignity should never be the price we pay for a role, reward, or relationship.

In the Book of Esther, Queen Vashti gives us a masterclass in bold decision-making. During a royal banquet, her husband—King Ahasuerus—became drunk and demanded that Vashti appear before his nobles, wearing her crown. In other words, he wanted to parade her like an object for the entertainment of others. (Talking about an uncomfortable moment.) Instead of adhering to her husband’s request, Vashti set a boundary that upset the king and eventually cost her her crown, position, and title as queen.  

Her choice wasn’t celebrated.

Her choice wasn’t easy.

But her choice was right.

Vashti understood something many of us are still learning: Her worth was not tied to a title, and someone else’s expectations couldn’t define her value. Like Vashti, we must learn to set boundaries—firmly and without apology.

Boundaries are not walls. They are bridges to self-respect, guardrails for our peace, and protection for our purpose. Saying no might make others uncomfortable, but compromising who we are to make others comfortable is far too expensive.

Here’s your reminder, sis:

• You are not selfish for protecting your peace.

• You are not difficult for requiring respect.

• You are not wrong for saying enough.

  
  

Stand tall in your worth. Speak up for your soul. Walk away if it costs you your spirit.

Because dignity, once surrendered, is hard to reclaim—but when preserved, it becomes a crown that no one can take.

You weren’t created to merely exist. You were created to reign.

Journaling Moment: Take a moment to reflect using the journal activity below:

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Reflection/Journal Prompt: Where in my life have I been shrinking to keep the peace, and what boundary do I need to set to protect my dignity?

Boundaries Printable Blog Post-August 2025.pdf

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